If I Don't Have You
by authoramandamarie
Summary: Harry, Ron, and Hermione are on their own and out of Hogwarts. After Harry and Hermione have finally gotten together, Harry has made a huge mistake and has made Hermione leave. Harry's heart is breaking, as is Hermione's. Can Ron fix it?


A/N: Okay, I read a BSB song-fic, and of course that got me going. So, here's the first:

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters or the lyrics. They belong to Rowling and BSB.  
  
_Every day girl I wake up and pray  
That you'll come back home  
And don't take too long _

Flashback

Harry growled. He was so frustrated. She made him so mad. "Hermione, I can't take this! All I wanted to know was where you were! Why can't you tell me that?!" Harry didn't know for sure why he was acting this way. He trusted her, he did, but something didn't feel right about the way she'd been acting lately. He looked at her face, her eyes full of tears.

"Harry," she said quietly, "I can't take this anymore. I don't know why you can't trust me when I tell you that I didn't do anything with anybody." Her heart ached for him. She knew what she had to do, and she wasn't going to let anyone or anything stop her. "I'm sorry, Harry."

Harry just stared at her. He was aching for her, but his anger was in the way, over-powering any of his feelings for her. "Oh, you say you're sorry now? So you did do something! I was right! Now, tell me what it was!"

Hermione let her tears fall. She just stared at the one she loved, her heart breaking. She didn't say a word as she pulled her coat over her and took the end of her trunk. She smiled weakly and sadly at him as she walked out the door.

End of Flashback

_  
'Cause since you've been gone  
Everything's gone all wrong  
I wish you were here  
Holding me near _

Harry sighed, looking at the broken picture frame. Ron watched his friend. He knew Harry missed her. Ron also knew that Harry had no reason to be without her. He had warned Harry to trust Hermione. _If only he had waited another week, he would've seen the truth,_ Ron thought to himself as Harry dropped on the couch.

Harry threw a pillow over his face. "I'll just suffocate myself," he said, muffled by the pillow. Ron rolled his eyes, pulling the pillow away. "Come on, Ron. What's the point? Nothing is right anymore. It's been a month since I got fired. It's been two months since the accident."

Ron flinched at that word. The accident, he had almost forgotten. Harry had almost died and was unconscious for almost a month. Hermione had been there, but left when she heard he was awake. "Don't talk about all the bad that happens," Ron said to him sympathetically. "It will only depress you."

"I'm already depressed, in case you haven't noticed." Harry growled and tugged at his hair. He was trying his hardest not to cry, but all he could think about was her.

_  
You know I'd go  
Out of my mind  
If you ever left  
My heart behind  
So I'm begging you please  
Bring your sweet love back to me (please come back to me) _

Flashback

"Oh, Harry, I've had the best time tonight." Harry smiled at the girl standing in front of him. He couldn't believe that she had agreed to go out with him and that she actually had for the last three months. She was so perfect and everything he ever wanted.

"Well, Ms. Granger, I'm glad you came with me again," he said, smiling at her, taking her inside and shutting the door. She smiled as he brushed her cheek with the back of his hand. He slowly brought a hand to her waist and pulled her closer. "If you want me to stop, just tell me," he said quietly. She nodded at him and took in his scent. He breathed in the sweet smell of her hair and laid a hand on the back of her neck gently. He slowly brought her in, touching her lips with his gently.

Hermione shivered as he started kissing her, and she returned his kiss. She slowly brought both of her hands to his waist and rubbed his lower back softly. Harry wrapped his arms around her, pulling her in close enough to pick her up. He took her in his arms and carried her carefully to the bed in his loft apartment, careful not to break their kiss. She stroked his head and allowed him to take her right then. It was a night neither one of them would forget.

End of Flashback

_  
  
If I don't have you (don't have you)  
To hold on to (to hold on to)  
I can't go on  
In this world alone  
Baby it's true  
If I don't have you _

Harry walked slowly down the streets of London. Ron was up ahead somewhere, but Harry didn't care to keep up. He watched as people passed him, noticing every couple holding hands or hugging each other. His heart ached with each site, and he felt he couldn't walk any farther. It was getting dark, the walks carrying fewer and fewer people, and he wrapped his arms around himself. He threw his head back and let out a painful cry, collapsing to the sidewalk.

_  
If you said good-bye (you said good-bye)  
Girl I would die (girl I would die)  
I'm a star with no light  
A day with no night  
If I don't have you _

Harry sighed, hugging the couch pillow. Ron sat quietly in the chair beside him. Ron seemed to just be quiet company for Harry. There wasn't much communication, but he was keeping Harry alive. Harry peered over his shoulder at Ron. "Do you think she'll come back?"

Ron looked up at Harry quickly. "I don't know, Harry. You hurt her pretty wickedly." Harry let a small tear run down his face and Ron turned away awkwardly. Somehow Ron had to make this right. "Listen, Harry, I've got an errand to run. I'll be home in a while." Harry nodded and lay back on the sofa, slowly drifting off to sleep.

Ron made his way to Hermione's front door. He still hadn't figured out what he was going to say yet, but he had to try something. He slowly rang the bell and heard footsteps coming towards it. A surprised Hermione opened the door.

"Ron! What are you doing here?" Her face still showed a broken heart and Ron sighed.

"Hermione, I'm not going to say anything but, first thing tomorrow morning, go to Harry's place that you were preparing. Don't ask me why, I'm leaving you. Just be there at nine, okay?"

Hermione stared at her red-headed friend. "O – okay, I – I'll be there." Ron smiled and gave her a quick hug before apparating away. He still had things to do and Hermione's project to finish.

_  
Late at night  
I reach to hold you tight  
But you're not there (you're just not there baby)  
I know you still care (I know you still care) _

Harry turned over in his bed sleepily the next morning. He reached his arm over and it fell over an empty bed. Harry sat up, rubbing his eyes, which were reddened from crying. A picture of Hermione stood on the stand next to the bed. He looked at it, a twinge of hurt in his heart. "Oh, Hermione," he said to an empty room, "what was I thinking? I trusted you. What have I done?" He pulled his knees to his chest and dropped his head on his knees. "I just want to hold you again."

"Well, come on then." Ron had suddenly appeared in the doorway, his arms crossed in front of him. Harry snapped his head up in surprise. "Come on, Harry, get up."

Harry looked at Ron like he was crazy. "Why?"

Ron rolled his eyes. "Just trust me," he said, running over and grabbing Harry's arm. Ron began pulling Harry down the still empty streets. It was Sunday morning, and most people were at church service. Ron smiled as a familiar sight came into view. "Good, here we are."

Harry looked up, trying to figure out where Ron was dragging him. Harry lowered his eyes in confusion when he saw Sirius's family house come into view. "What are we doing here? Nobody's been here for years."

Ron shook his head. "Oh what little you know," he said, opening the front door. He threw Harry inside. "Now, I'll see you at home." Ron left before Harry could protest.

_  
And all I need  
You're soft and love, lovely kiss  
You give to me (to me)  
So tenderly  
Will you still feel  
The time will stand still  
When I see you, baby you will  
So hurry home  
_

Harry sighed as Ron got further and further out of site. He didn't want to be here. The place was dirty, smelled horrible, and was completely unlivable. He turned around to look about the place, and found the place clean and beautiful.

Every wall had new paper or paint. Every piece of furniture had been restored. The floors and ceilings were sparkling. He walked into the front room. Just the same, clean, fresh, beautiful. Harry continued to walk through the house. Every room looked like it had never been dirty. The stairs, Harry noticed as he headed for the second floor, had also been refinished. The second floor was just as nice, and Harry couldn't believe his eyes. He slowly opened the main bedroom door. He found a large four-post bed with a red velvet duvet. A figure stood looking out the bedroom window.

Harry suddenly realized who was there. "Hermione?" he said quietly.

The figure turned around, and Hermione's familiar face was about him. "Do you like it?" Hermione asked awkwardly. Harry looked around, a bit in shock.

"You did this?" he asked.

Hermione nodded slowly. "Well, I did most of it. Ron finished it for me last night. I was going to give this to you for your birthday, but you didn't seem to want to trust me." Harry's heart began to break all over again. He was such an idiot, so he thought.

"Oh, Hermione. I feel so awful," he said, slowly walking towards her. "Can you ever forgive me?" Hermione closed her eyes, not wanting to respond. "Oh Hermione, I've been a great prune. I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I beg for it. I haven't been anything without you, and I've been kicking myself every day for hurting you like I did."

Hermione opened her eyes and met Harry's gaze. She couldn't stay mad at him. Ron had told her of all of Harry's actions, and she knew how badly Harry hated himself for what had happened between them. She gave him a weak smile and walked towards him, reaching for his hand. "Oh, Harry. I've missed you so much."

Harry let out a sigh of relief. "You have no idea how much I've missed you." He pulled her to him and placed a hand on the side of her face. "I'm never gonna let you go again," he said, looking her straight in the eyes. "That is, if you'll have me again." Hermione nodded.

"Yes, I'll have you again."

"Will you stay with me always?" Harry asked her.

"Is that a proposal?"

Harry nodded slowly, not letting go of her. Hermione smiled, bringing her lips to his, kissing him softly. It was a moment that would lead them to the rest of their lives.


End file.
